These words are part of my new vocabulary and I like them. I am taking a Vision and Manifestation Class and am also reading the Four Hour Work Week. Very Good stuff, and I realized today that my blog is going to part about Winslow and part about Creating my life.
Let's see if this works. There is nothing to lose.
First, I just want to say that I need a camera, a nice DSLR (so I'm told) camera. I want to capture moments I see in Winslow every day, and I want to start taking pictures of myself. Don't gasp, I want to see what I look like.
Secondly, I want to say that although I know that no one is reading this blog, as I write, I imagine that everyone is reading this blog. So, someone, please send me a nice, new or hardly used camera that will enable me to take pictures that capture the romance of every day.
Winslow - he's getting so big, yet he's so small. He's older than two but younger than 2 and a half, and I am really bad at remembering the exact month that he is in. I know it's important for milestones, but I look at him and see a happy, healthy, silly, cute, talkative little guy. The only thing I'm really worried about right now is that he thinks everything is green. "What color is that boat?" "Gween," He states emphatically. "It's red," I assure him. "It's gween," he reminds me.
So, for now, everything is green, and that's okay, but when he's 6 or 7, I'll double check that he knows his colors, and if everything is still GWEEN, then he may be color blind.
His new nickname is Andre, as in Andre Agassi. Toby bought him a badminton racquet and a little birdie today, and Winslow got so frustrated with the whole thing that he threw the raquet to the ground over and over. He knows how to say, "I'm fwustwated," but today, he chose to scream and yell instead of use his words to express himself.
Have I left God behind? Maybe, but I don't think so. I've left religion behind. I will say that I miss it, I miss the familiarity of what I knew to be true in the formative years, but I'm forming my own future and taking with me only the parts that don't leave me suicidal and rocking in a fetal position at a friends house while trying to pretend that everything is fine.
I love words, and my new favorite word is "Create." My visioning class taught me to be the primary creative force in my life, and I want to try it. It feels uncomfortable and risky, but there is a fire in my belly that I was born with, and that fire keeps me unsatisfied with boredom or things that aren't "right." My life hasn't been right for a long time, but it has been making it's way toward right, and it is getting righter still.
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